Stoking the fire

Does EVERY filmmaker make at least ONE depressing film?

1. STUDIES HAVE SHOWN that every filmmaker makes at least one film in their life, usually in their mid to late teens, that deals with one of the following topics:
2. - depression
3. - suicide
4. - relationship break-down
5. - death
6. - blood, gore, violent crime
7. - zombies & vampires
8. OK, I made that bit up -- 'studies have shown...' -- but I have a hunch.
9. It's my new thesis-on-the-fly. As we search for films, I've been talking to Media teachers in secondary schools, I've observed it myself at student film nights, and I've also observed it in my own filmmaking career. I remember back in the 90s, our group of young filmmakers at Open Chanel (Melb) made a short drama about a guy who went crazy and shot the whole family. Ew yeh, so tragic.
10. So here's my (rough) theory:
11. we all make at least one rite-of-passage film.
12. We say to ourselves, "I'm now old enough to make a film like this", so as if to prove our own maturity, we make it. Blood gushing, people in terror, sadness, death... it will be R rated, or close to... but whatever form it takes, it will definitely NOT be suitable for showing to our little sister without giving them serious nightmares for the next 20 years.
13. Is this right?
14. Apparently EMO died when MYSPACE died. But the angst-ridden emotion that lay behind it all lives on in new guises, especially among young filmmakers. Is this right?
15. What do you think?